No, these people aren’t Algonquin College students being persecuted for driving to school. These are their parents, married to their autos, and too lazy to park in the merchant’s free parking lot behind the store. Much easier to just park on the sidewalk.
Why don’t they stop on the road? Heavens! that would block traffic! That would be a sin! Much better to park on the sidewalk, the pedestrians won’t even know, and if one comes by, there’s lots of room to squeeze by.
Mr Red Volvo the Duck Lover, parks 100% on the sidewalk. He does this regularly, while his wife/mistress runs in to buy the meat.
At times like this I wish I walking with a seven-year old boy. I’d help him climb up the rear bumper, walk over the roof of the car, slide down the front window, and off the front bumper. That should drive the driver apoplectic!
Back in the 60’s my late uncle used to work on the Sparks Street Mall near Bank. There was a French-rights campaigner who used to drive down the Mall every day at noon to protest that there weren’t “no driving” signs in French. One day my uncle and a group of his loitering-on-the-mall lunch buddies walked before and behind the car at a dead slow walk, it took them a half hour to escort guy the one block while tourists clicked pictures of the quaint Ottawa customs. What Changing of the Guard, this is escorting the car!
More habitually, said Uncle used to spot cars blocking a cross walk, he’d march up to them, open the back door, scoot through on the seat, and exit the other side, leaving both doors wide open. This of course, predates auto-locking doors and paranoid-from-suburbia drivers.
Getting back to those selfish on-the-sidewalk parkers, what can we do about them? Call 3-1-1 and get the sidewalk visited by by-law officers, say, next week? Or is there something quicker we can do?
Right now, I like the idea of really sticky stickers that I can whip out of my commodious pockets and affix right on the centre of the driver’s windshield: Don’t Park on Our Sidewalk! Such stickers are available on the ‘net. And didn’t Billing’s Bridge Plaza do this a number of years ago on Rough Rider football nights, sticking them on parked cars after 9.30pm?
What creative — and preferably legal — suggestions do you have?